Things That Make Me Angry: Ambiguous Warning Shouts

Look out! Watch out! Heads up! What are you supposed to do when someone shouts one of these at you? Most people hunch over slightly and feebly raise their hands close to their head. Another common reaction is to turn directly towards the source of the warning, which, if this is also the source of the impending danger, is about the worst thing you could do. I propose instead a series of six generally accepted warning shouts: Stop! Run! Duck! Jump! Step left! Step right! Doesn’t that seem much more likely to save your life than HEADS UP? Even if you don’t know your left from your right, you still have a 50/50 chance, which I would say is better odds than you get from WATCH OUT!

Economics Rap

Math Rap has been on the great big list of things that make me angry for some time. But I may actually have found something much much worse.

Rogers pays the bill for cell screw up

One of the best stories in a long time about a consumer who refused to roll over. What would you do if your phone company insisted that you pay a $12,000 bill to cover charges incurred by a criminal? I love that even when the complainants eventually had the charges waved, they still insisted on sitting down with the CEO to talk about how brutal the experience was. Hopefully they will also discuss preventative measures - something as simple as freezing service when a pre-arranged billing limit is reached would have avoided the problem and saved Rogers a buttload of bad publicity.

Brutal Christmas Music

This is the time of year I start thinking deaf people have it pretty good. The idea of never having to listen to Jingle Bell Rock is compelling. If there was anything remotely rock-like about the song, I could at least understand it, though I'm sure I would still despise it. Fiona Scott-Norman takes a look at some other crap Christmas music in The Age.

Canadian Self-Righteousness

Self-righteousness in any form tends to make me angry, and many Canadians are taking on a particularly annoying form of it right now. See David Young’s letter to the editor from yesterday’s Globe and Mail, and my response to it.

The ambassador's words
Dec 15, 2005 Page: A20
Byline: DAVID YOUNG

It's a fine measure of the Bush White House's ham-fisted incompetence that it can't even manage to maintain cordial relations with Canada (Washington Scolds Ottawa -- Dec. 14).

Within his own borders, President George W. Bush has shown nothing but contempt for those who publicly disagree with his policies. He has no interest in the give and take of ideas that is central to a healthy democracy.

On the international stage, his cadre of ideological fantasists has done incalculable damage to the American agenda, unravelling relationships and obligations, draining reservoirs of goodwill and replacing compromise and accommodation with the loutish behaviour of a schoolyard bully.

Canada's responsibility in the cross-border relationship is to speak truth to power. Until the U.S. electorate comes to its senses and shows this evangelical dry drunk and his rogue regime the door, ambassador David Wilkins should shut his gob and hope that we don't turn off the energy tap.

That neighbourly spat
Globe & Mail
Dec 16 03:03 Page: A22
Byline: ANGRYMAN

David Young (The Ambassador's Words -- letter, Dec. 14) describes the Bush administration as a rogue regime of ham-fisted, incompetent, loutish evangelicals. Further, he advises U.S. Ambassador David Wilkins to "shut his gob." Yet, Mr. Young marvels at the Americans' inability to maintain cordial relations with Canada. Canadians being so very polite, you know.

Surprise Parties

If you are surprised by your friends throwing you a surprise party, I strongly recommend that you get some new friends. There are two primary surprise party situations where surprise is likely to be induced.

Situation 1: You like parties, but never expected that your friends would throw one in honour of your birthday - you must think your friends are jerks.

Situation 2: You hate parties, and because of this you did not expect your friends to throw one in honour of your birthday - surprise, your friends are jerks.

Christmas Lights

Why do homeowners take their lights down every year? Because they know that they're fucking ugly. If the lights looked good, people would leave them up right? The Ugly Christmas Lights site has some extreme examples of how bad things can get. If for some reason you insist on Christmas lights (baby Jesus sure did love ostentatious displays of unnecessary spending) please follow two simple rules. 1: Consistency of colour and illumination - nothing looks tackier than blue, yellow, green, orange, orange, orange red, pink; and nothing looks more ghetto than one strand of lights that flashes quickly, one that flashes slowly and one that doesn't flash at all. 2: No "icicle lights" - while they can be applauded for generally being uniform in colour, they sure as hell don't look like icicles. They look like a raccoon has gotten at your wiring and created an electrical fire hazard.